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Happy Holidays, INTJs

Tuesday December 12, 2017

Since I’ve been sending these out recently, I’ll share them with you. Here are my introductory notes, sent to my INTJ clients: Getting the Most out of Coaching as an INTJ. (PDF)

If you’re meeting with a coach, advisor, counselor, etc. you may find the above document useful, even if your coach is not me.

If you’re interested in meeting with a coach, or finding out what that means, I offer a free hour-long coaching session to see if coaching is a good fit for you. Take a look at the document above first, maybe. My current rate is $125 USD for an hour-long session (via Skype, Whatsapp, phone, etc.) and some phone calls and/or emails during the month. It’s a ridiculously cheap investment aimed at improving your entire life, really. If you could use personal feedback and advisement, and prefer to talk to someone who shares large chunks of your psychology, we should talk.

With that business out of the way, here are some things I’ve been interested in lately:

Integrating Film & Practice

I’m incorporating movie scenes and little clips into my coaching practice. The cool thing about psychology is…well, it’s a frustrating thing, really: Everything applies to some principle within psychology. I’m watching a film thinking “oh, great moment, I should send out a clip of that” and then I think of ten more clips I want to share.

Like, let’s say this is you phoning your brain for help when you have just encountered a huge new problem in your life. I mean that’s pretty much exactly how it goes. So what are you going to do, Condor? What did he do?

Specific Films

Have you seen Sorcerer? This is IMO a great film for an INTJ to embrace and understand. You’re the truck driver, we’re all that truck driver. The payload is your state of mind, your life experience, right? Watch the film.

Another great film from the same period: The Changeling, starring George C. Scott. How do you handle those outside factors that pester you, the subjective unknown? As an INTJ this is high-leverage territory but so few have explored it. And I don’t mean ghosts, just the unknown. Simple stuff. Fun stuff.

Gesture

My gesture-analysis skills are totally sick, or so I was told by a group for whom I did some art and handwriting analysis recently. In this case, “gesture” indicates handwriting, drawing, doodling, etc. I have developed two new drawing exercises that help me guide a client to a better viewpoint from which they can observe themselves. The range of psychological color you get from markings on paper submitted by different people is simply amazing. It’s a real treat to look at. Strengths pop right out. Weaknesses are obvious but if you talk about strengths you can work around to a better position from which to attack weaknesses.

Warnings

I am extremely glad I have pushed through just about every “you’ll shoot your eye out” warning I’ve received in the last few years. Examples:

  • What are you researching that topic for, it’s long dead!
  • Don’t study that topic, it’s pseudoscience!
  • Why are you using that technology, it’s obsolete!
  • That alternative mental model for solving this kind of problem is outdated!
  • Why are you inventing your own method for doing X, when we have established method Y!
  • I’ve heard of that exercise technique / diet plan /etc. and I’m suspicious! You’ll shoot your eye out!

Then guess what—I get a great result, discover some new stuff, and the same people tell me, “it’s great that it worked out for you, but I could never let myself learn/do that.”

At least they’re being honest.

Improvised Forest Hot Tubs

Excellent.

Tutorials

I’ll bet a lot of INTJs can benefit from watching this video on tutorials and analyzing the author’s approach to the problem he encountered. Big tip…

Perfection

Humans are generally in a huge bind on the question of perfection, growth, and change. We hesitate to grow because it’s not possible, or is it? Pushing yourself is not desirable, or is it? Don’t worry about changing yourself, just relax…or should you?

I’ve been studying this topic for a while now, writing about it, thinking about it. In my opinion, you should head toward perfection as if it’s absolutely achievable. Take change very seriously. And while you’re doing that, make the rate of change comfortable in order to make your growth sustainable. That last point will be the hard one for the average INTJ with a handful of goals.

Also, if something is nagging you, like some bad habit or a tendency to think your future is gloomy, analyze the problem as soon as possible, inside and out. Talk it out with someone else or write it out in a journal. untitled(6).txt :-)

New Year’s Resolutions

Tip: Keep a log of your anxiety levels in the days following the setting of any resolutions for next year. Log any other factors you can think of. Remember: To increase control, add instrumentation.

Tip: Calendar a few days spread across next year to review your resolutions. Set an alert.

Tip: After all that, write down your findings.

Question: What goals do you already have in mind for next year? Let me know.

There’s no way to summarize all this so I’ll just say: Write me if you want to chat, my email’s in the sidebar. Enjoy your time off if you take some time off (you should!) and hang in there if you’re suffering.

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